THE
PREFACE.
THE indecent Images, and the frequent and bad Imitations of the Classics in the Dunciad, have occasioned several just Observations upon so new and coarse a Manner of Writing: I shall wave this Topic at present, and only regard the most plausible Insinuation in Favour of this Author; which is, that he never begun an Attack upon any Person, who had not before, either in Print or private Conversation, endeavour’d something to his Disadvantage.
This Assertion is by no means true, as I shall immediately shew; if it were true, it might indeed bear some Weight, but however with this Distinction, that the Reports of private vi Conversation, brought to him by such Emissaries, as belong to him, are not always to be believed, and that no Attack in Print upon a Man’s Poetical Character, ought to be repaid by Lampoon and Virulence upon the Moral Character of his Antagonist: Every Person has a Right to determine upon the Talents of Writers, particularly of one, who appears in Publick only to gratify the two worst Appetites, that disgrace Human Nature, I mean Malice and Avarice; and sure no Man deserves a violent Injury to his Reputation, as a Gentleman, because perhaps at a Distance of several Years since he might have said, that Mr. Pope had nothing in him Original as a Writer, that Mr. Tickel greatly excelled him in his Translation of Homer, and many of his Contemporaries in other Branches of Writing, and that he is infinitely inferior to Mr. Phillips in Pastoral: And yet such Arguments or Apologies as these have been used by himself, or his Tea-Table Cabals, for calling Gentlemen Scoundrels, Blockheads, Gareteers, and Beggars,: If he can transmit them to Posterity under such Imputations, he is a bad Man; if he cannot, he is a bad Writer: I believe, that he would rather suffer under the first Character, than the last: But before I have done with him, I will make a very strict Inquiry into both.
In the mean time I shall shew the Reader, in general, the Falshood of his main Pretence, that he has meddled with no one, that had not before hurt him, and in this View, tho’ I should be ashamed of being too serious in a Controversy of this Sort, I think it proper to acquaint the Town with the original Design of the Dunciad, and the real Reasons of its Production. This Piece, which has been honour’d by Booksellers of Quality, contains only the Poetical Part of Dulness, extracted from a Libel, call’d, The Progress of it, and which included several other vii Branches of Science, and perhaps some of those Gentlemen, who have in the warmest Manner asserted the Cause of the Dunciad, might have seen a Publication of a Work, upon the Death of this Writer, in which no past Friendship could have screen’d them from Lampoon for any Pretences to excel in any Science whatever: It appears, therefore, that he was teaz’d into a Publication of these Cantos, which regarded the Writers of the Age, by some Attacks, that were made upon him about that Time: We must refer to a Miscellany of Poems published by Him and Swift, to which is prefix’d, An Essay on the Profund, to consider if those Attacks were justifiable; Mr. Dean Swift never saw the Profund, till made publick, and Dr. Arburthnot, who originally sketch’d the Design of it, desired that the Initial Letters of Names of the Gentlemen abused might not be inserted, that they might be A or B, or Do or Ro, or any thing of that Nature, which would make this Satire a general one upon any dull Writers in any Age: This was refused by Pope, and he chose rather to treat a Set of Gentlemen as Vermin, Reptiles, &c. at a Time when he had no Provocation to do so, when he had closed his Labours, finish’d his great Subscriptions, and was in a fashionable Degree of Reputation: Several Gentlemen, who are there ranked with the dullest Men, or dullest Beasts, never did appear in Print against him, or say any thing in Conversation which might affect his Character: Some Replies, which were made to the Profund, occasioned the Publication of the Dunciad, which was first of all begun with a general Malice to all Mankind, and now appears under an Excuse of Provocations, which he had received, after he himself had struck the first Blow in the above-mentioned Miscellanies.
viiiI cannot indeed say much in Praise of some Performances, which appear’d against him, and am sorry that Voluntiers enter’d into the War, whom I could wish to have been only Spectators: But the Cause became so general, that some Gentlemen, who never aim’d at the Laurel, grew Poets merely upon their being angry: A Militia, in Case of publick Invasion, may perhaps be thought necessary, but yet one could always wish for an Army of regular Troops: I should not have touched upon this Circumstance, but to obviate some Imputations, which he had suggested, of my Writing several Pieces, which I never heard of, till I saw them with the rest of the Town: But these Suggestions shall be considered in the Preface to the next Epistle, in which, among other Things, I intend to state several Matters of Fact, in Contradiction to the Notes of the Dunciad, particularly as they concern the Writers of the following Poem.
ONE
EPISTLE
TO
Mr. A. POPE,
Occasion’d By
Two Lately Publiſh’d.
IF noble B——m, a in Metre known,
With Strains has grac’d thee, humble as thy own;
Who b G—l—n’s Dullness did for thine discard,
A better Critick, for as bad a Bard!
Not unregarded let this Tribute be,
Tho’ humble, just; well-bred, tho’ paid to Thee.
[10]Parnassian Groves, and Twick’nam Fountains, say,
What Homage to the Bard shall Britain pay!
The Bard! that first, from Dryden’s thrice-glean’d Page,
Cull’d his low Efforts to Poetic Rage;
Nor pillag’d only that unrival’d Strain,
* A Translator of Homer.But rak’d for Couplets * Chapman and Duck-Lane,
Has sweat each Cent’ry’s Rubbish to explore,
And plunder’d every Dunce that writ before,
Catching half Lines, till the tun’d Verse went round,
Complete, in smooth dull c Unity of Sound;
Who, stealing Human, scorn’d Celestial Fire,
† Burlesque of the first Psalm, more profest than Sternbold’s.And strung to Smithfield Airs the † Hebrew Lyre;
Who taught declining d Wycherley to doze
O’er wire-drawn Sense, that tinkled in the Close,
To lovely F——r impious and obscene,
To mud-born Naiads faithfully unclean;
[11] B2Whose raptur’d Nonsense, with Prophetick Skill,
First taught that Ombre, which fore-ran Quadrille;
Who from the Skies, propitious to the Fair,
** See Verses, in P—pe’s Poems, to the Memory of an unfortunate young Lady.Brought down Cæcilia, and sent ** Cloris there,
Censur’d by W—ke, by A———ry blest,
Prais’d Sw——t in Earnest, and sung Heav’n in Jest,
Here, mov’d by Whim, and there by Envy stung,
‡ Sir W. Y.Would flatter Ch——s, or would libel ‡ Y——ge,
By F——n left, by Reverend Linguists hated,
Now learns to read the Greek he once translated.
Oh say, to him what Trophies shall be rais’d,
That unprovok’d will strike, and fawn unprais’d!
Each fav’rite Toast who marks, or rising Wit,
To sketch a Satire, that in Time may fit;
Still hopes your Sun-set, while he views your Noon,
And still broods o’er the closely-kept Lampoon;
[12]The lurking Presents o’er the Tomb he paid,
And thus atton’d our British Virgil’s Shade,
* Libel on Mr. Addison in P—pe and Sw—t’s Miscellanies.A Mushroom * Satire in his Life conceal’d,
Since chang’d to Libel, and in Print reveal’d;
† Lady M. W. M.Who lets not † Beauty base Detraction ’scape,
And mocks Deformity with Æsop’s Shape;
Who Cato’s Muse with faithless Sneers belied,
The Prologue father’d, and the Play decried,
‡ Lord B——p of Salisbury.On ‡ H——y’s learned Page, dull-sporting trod,
Betray’d his Patrons, and lampoon’d his God;
Translator, Editor, could far out-go
In Homer Ogleby, in Shakespeare R——
O! how burlesqu’d, great Dryden, is thy Strain,
When little Alexander ‖ slays the Slain!
‖ See Dryden’s Ode on St. Cæcilia’s Day.
———Fought all his Battles o’er again;
———And thrice he slew the Slain.
On, mighty Rhimer, haste new Palms to seize,
Thy little, envious, angry Genius teize;
Let thy weak wilful Head, unrein’d by Art,
Obey the Dictates of thy flatt’ring Heart;
Divide a busy, fretful Life between
Smut, Libel, Sing-song, Vanity, and Spleen;
With long-brew’d Malice warm thy languid Page,
And urge delirious Nonsense into Rage;
Let bawdy Emblems, now, thy Hours beguile;
Now, Fustian Epic, aping Virgil’s Stile;
To Virgil like, to Indian Clay as Delf,
Or Pulteney, drawn by Jervase, to Herself:
Rheams heap’d on Rheams, incessant, mayst thou blot,
A lively, trifling, pert, one knows not what!
Form thy light Measures, nimbler than the Wind,
Whilst heavy lingring Sense is left behind;
With all thy Might pursue, and all thy Will,
That unabating Thirst, to scribble still,
[14]Giv’n at thy Birth! the Poetaster’s Gust,
False and unsated as the Eunuch’s Lust!
Illustrious Fops, mean time, o’er-rate thy Lays,
And blooming Critics, as they spell thee, praise:
Blest Coupleteer! by blooming Critics read,
At Toilets ogled, and with Sweetmeats fed:
See, lisping Toilers grace thy Dunciad’s Cause,
And scream their witty Scavenger’s Applause,
While powder’d Wits, and lac’d Cabals rehearse
Thy bawdy Cento, and thy Bead-roll Verse;
Gay, bugled Statesmen on thy Side debate,
And libel’d Blockheads court thee, tho’ they hate.
*******
*******
Fools of all Kinds their Suffrages impart,
The Fools of Nature, and the Fools of Art.
[15]These in thy threadbare Farce shall Beauties show,
* Temple of Fame by P—— ‡ P——pe’s Pastorals. † See the Original Preface to the Dunciad.Shall praise thy ribald Mirth, and maudlin Woe;
Praise ev’n thy imitating Chaucer’s Tales,
And call that merry * Temple, Fame’s Versailles:
Thy ‡ Shepherd-Song with Rapture they shall see,
Which rivals Philips, as Banks rivals Lee;
Thy † Guernsey and Barbados Wreath shall own,
Where Durfey ne’er was read, nor Settle known;
That Wreath, that Name, which thro’ both Worlds is gone,
Which Doctor e Y—— applauds, and Prestor John.
Lo! as Anchises, to the Goddess-born,
So I the Worthies, that thy Page adorn,
[16] ‖ The Characters left out here may perhaps be inserted in some future Edition of this Poem.Point out to Thee.——See ‖ here ****
*******
*******
*******
The Prelate! next, exil’d by cruel Fates,
Who plagues all Churches, and confounds all States;
With Treasons past perplex’d, and present Cares;
A Fop in Rhime, and Bungler in Affairs.
*******
*******
And here! a Groupe of Brother Quill-men see,
Co-witlings all, and Demi-bards like Thee;
Such whom the Muse shall pass with just Disdain,
Nor add one Trophy to thy mottly Train:
But Quack Arb——t shall Oblivion blot,
That puzzling, plodding, prating, pedant Scot!
[17] CThe grating Scribler! whose untun’d Essays
Mix the Scotch Thistle with the English Bays,
By either Phœbus pre-ordain’d to Ill,
The Hand prescribing, or the flattering Quill,
Who doubly plagues, and boasts two Arts to kill!
’Midst this vain Tribe, that aid thy setting Ray,
The Muse shall view, but spare ill-faced G—y:
Poor f G—y, who loses most when most he wins.
And gives his Foes his Fame, and bears their Sins;
Who more by Fortune than by Nature curst,
Yields his best Pieces, and must own Thy worst.
Thus prop’d, thy Head with Grub-street Zephyrs tainted,
By g Rich recorded, and by J—— painted;
J——! who so refin’d a Rake is reckon’d,
He breaks all h Sinai’s Laws, except the Second:
Thus prais’d, thus drawn, t’extend thy Projects try,
* The Phrases distinguished here in Italics, are truly quoted from P——pe; and the others in Company with them, ought to be in no other Company.Leave the Blue * Languish, and the Crimson Sigh;
[18]Leave the gay Epithets that Beauty crown,
** See Dunciad. Nigrina Black.White ** Whitylinda, and Brownissa Brown;
Forget awhile i Belinda and the Sun;
Forget the Fights of Stand, and Flights of Run:
No more let Ombre’s Play inspire thy Vein,
† Here a Card Table; in P—pe, a Field of Grass.Nor strow with Captive Kings the † Velvet Plain;
Omit awhile the Silver Peal to ring, Nor talk dulcissant, nor mellifluous sing, Nor hang suspended, nor adherent cling. |
But haste to mount Immortal Envy’s Throne,
To crush all Merit, that disputes thy own;
For thou wert born to damp each rising Name,
And hang, like Mildews, on the Growth of Fame;
Fame’s fairest Blossoms let thy Rancour blast,
Bane of the modern Laurel, like the past;
While stupid Riot stands in Humour’s Place,
And bestial Filth, Humanity’s Disgrace,
[19] C2 †† Wilmot, Earl of Rochester.Low Lewdness, unexcited by Desire,
And all great †† Wilmot’s Vice, without his Fire.
At length, when banish’d Pallas shall withdraw,
And Wit’s made Treason by the Popian Law;
When minor Dunces cease, at length, their Strife,
And own thy Patent to be dull for Life;
By Tricks sustain’d, in Poet-craft compleat,
Retire triumphant to thy Twick’nam Seat;
That Seat! the Work of k half-paid drudging Br——me,
And call’d by joking Tritons, Homer’s Tomb:
There to stale, stol’n, stum Crambo bid adieu,
And sneer the Fops, that thought thy Crambo new;
There, like the Grecian Chief, on whom thy Song
Has well reveng’d unhappy Priam’s Wrong;
Waste, in thy hidden Cave, the Festive Day,
With mock Machaon, and Patroclus G——
[20]Sleep, l Sleep in Peace the Works, for Wapping born!
No more thy Cuckoo Note shall wake the Morn;
In Ease, and Avarice, and aukward State,
The Fool of Fortune, shalt thou hail thy Fate;
Slumbring in Quiet o’er Lampoons half writ,
Which, ripe in Malice, only wait for Wit.
So when Vanessa yielded up her Charms,
The blest Cadenus languish’d in her Arms;
High, on a Peg, his unbrush’d Beaver hung,
His Vest unbutton’d, and his God unsung;
Raptur’d he lies; Deans, Authors are forgot,
Wood’s Copper Pence, and Atterbury’s Plot;
For her he quits the Tythes of Patrick’s Fields,
And all the Levite to the Lover yields.
NOTES
On the Foregoing
POEM.
(a) If Noble B———m,
THE late Duke of Buckingham! who made that fine Alteration of the Tragedy of Julius Cæsar from Shakespeare, and who is said by Mr. Pope to have bestow’d the finest Praise upon Homer that he ever received, in the following Lines;
Read Homer once, and you need read no more;
For all Things else will be so mean and poor,
Verse will seem Prose: Yet often on him look,
And you will never need another Book.
D—— of B——’s Essay on Poetry.
He has also printed a Copy of Verses in Praise of Pope, which were returned by another in Praise of his Grace. There is so great a Similitude in the Stile of these Writers, that the Reader, I think, need not doubt their Sincerity in admiring each other.
[22]’Tis great Delight to laugh at some Mens Ways;
But ’tis much greater to give Merit Praise.
D—— of B——.
Sheffield approves, consenting Phœbus bends,
And I and Malice from this Hour, am Friends.
Pope.
(b) Who G———n’s Dulness———
Charles Gildon, dismiss’d from the D——’s Pension and Favour, on Account of his Obstinacy in refusing to take the Oaths to P—pe’s Supremacy.
(c) Smooth dull Unity of Sound.
P—pe’s Reputation for versifying is a vulgar Error, founded only on discreet Theft: Half a Line from Mr. Dryden’s Conquest of Mexico, and another from his Translation of Virgil, have seemingly made tolerable Music, when join’d in his Works; but Music of the Morocco Kind, which has but one Note.
(d) Who taught declining Wycherley———
Mr. Wycherley subscribed to a Compliment (some say, before his Death) upon P—pe’s Pastorals, in which he says, his Arcadia speaks the Language of the Mall, but does not explain, whether he means at Noon or Night. I do not agree with what Mr. Wycherley is supposed to have writ of him, but I do with what he certainly said of him, viz. That he was not able to make a Suit of Cloaths, but could perhaps turn an old Coat.
(e) Which Doctor Y———
The Reverend Doctor Edward Young, who, in this Quarrel of the great contending Powers in Poesy, has been courted by all Sides: But some late Incidents give a Suspicion, that he has privately acceded to the Treaty of Twickenham.
[23](f) Poor G——, who loses most——
Mr. Gay, not thought to be the entire Author of the Beggar’s Opera, and ordered to own Three Hours after Marriage.
(g) By Rich recorded———
Gilbert Pickering Rich. A great Admirer of P—pe, eminent for his Translation of Horace, which can be equall’d by nothing but P—pe’s translating of Homer. He concludes the first Ode by giving (sublimi feriam sidera vertice) in these Words;
I’ll bound, I’ll spring, I’ll strike the weaken’d Pole,
I’ll knock so hard, I’ll knock thro’ it a Hole.
(h) ———Breaks all Sinai’s Laws except the Second.
Second Commandment: “Thou shalt not make the Likeness of any Thing in Heaven above, or on the Earth beneath, or the Waters under the Earth.”
(i) Forget awhile Belinda and the Sun.
In the Rape of the Lock, Belinda and the Sun are very often said to be very much alike, which occasion’d two Lines in Praise of that Poem, written by a Friend of Mr. Pope;
Here, like the Sun, Belinda strikes the Swain,
In the same Page like the same Sun again.
Monsieur Boileau, speaking of the Poetasters of his Nation, in a Poem to the King, makes this Comparison the Consummation of Dulness;
Et enfin te compare au Solœil.
And in the End he compares your Majesty to the Sun.
[24](k) ———Half-paid drudging B——me.
The Reverend Mr. B——me, who translated a great Part of Homer, and construed the Rest: N.B. A half-paid Poet is oftentimes the Occasion of an unpaid Taylor.
(l) Sleep, Sleep in Peace———
These Lines are a Parody of a famous Passage in the Tragedy of Phædra and Hyppolitus.
Sleep, Sleep in Peace, ye Monsters of the Wood:
No more my early Horn shall wake———
So when bright Venus yielded up her Charms,
The blest Adonis languish’d in her Arms;
His idle Horn on flagrant Myrtle hung,
His Arrows scatter’d, and his Bow unstrung;
Obscure in Covert lay his dreaming Hounds,
And bay’d the fancy’d Boar with feeble Sounds:
For nobler Sports he quits the savage Fields,
And all the Hero to the Lover yields.
FINIS.